Every night right before I lay my baby down in her crib, I pause and reflect on the fact that she won’t always be this little. I do my best to clear my head and stop just for a minute or two to really drink her in and etch into my memory the way she feels, smells and snuggles into my shoulder.
I do this because something inside of me knows that for the rest of my life I will reflect on this time and wish I could hold my baby again. Maybe it’s because I’m a second time mom and I know she won’t be little for long or maybe it’s because I’ve had strangers stop me and tell me to appreciate this time because it’s the most precious. No matter the reason, God is impressing on my heart to pause and memorize my children in this (and every) season of life.
I don’t want to look back and regret doing housework instead of playing cars with my son. I don’t want my arms to ache later in life because I was too busy to pick my children up while they were small enough to hold. I don’t want to waste these short precious years that God has given me with them because something on social media was more urgent than giggling with my little girl.
These are the desires of my heart, but not always the reality of how I live my life. I’m writing these words because I’ve had a pretty tough week struggling with my toddler. He’s definitely been testing his limits lately, but maybe he’s also crying out for his mommy’s attention. Either way, I don’t want to wish away these years for an “easier” season of life. I don’t want my children to remember me yelling and being stressed. I want them to remember me holding them and loving them. So it’s my prayer tonight that I would slow down and truly appreciate this season of life because once it’s gone I’ll probably wish it back and I don’t ever want to regret being too busy to hold my babies.